


still holding on

by ppcrker



Category: Spider-Man (Tom Holland Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-11-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:20:28
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 13,402
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24134212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ppcrker/pseuds/ppcrker
Summary: you made a choice last summer that filled you with regret. it’s time for the yearly beach trip, and you’d soon come to regret your decision even more. will you be able to mend your relationship with tom? or is all hope lost?
Relationships: Tom Holland (Actor)/Peter Parker/Reader
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

the end of june was approaching, and you knew what that meant. it was time for the beach trip, the one that happened every year. harrison, your best friend, and tom and his brothers usually went. things would be different this year, though.

you and tom had been in a relationship, for a year and two months. you’d broken up just after the beach trip last year.

a large disagreement had occurred, your family wanted to move far away from where tom lived. your dad had gotten quite a job offer.

with intentions of going with them, tom insisted on coming with. you wanted to go especially because the school you wanted to attend would be close by. you refused to let him, insisting that you couldn’t take him away from his life at home.

it tore you apart. given the fact that you’d been together for such a long time. you felt incapable of separating yourself from him, but you were headstrong about the fact that it was what was best for him in the end.

things ended with a bang, and you could’ve sworn he hated you for it. you didn’t know, and you didn’t think you’d ever know.

the job offer your dad received was delayed for a year, the position being put on hold.

you didn’t really question it, especially given the stress it put on your parents shoulders. you didn’t press the matter further.

the issue was, that year was coming to a close. you’d be leaving soon after this beach trip, it’d be your last with the group.

harrison’s parents had an insanely large beach house — oceanfront, with five bedrooms and three bathrooms, a large patio and a swimming pool. it was a beautiful place, with beautiful scenery. you’d truly miss it.

you knew that harrison would be there, along with harry, and jake — an old friend of harrison’s, you didn’t know if tom would be.

and that very fact is what left you anxious.

your bags were packed and in the backseat of your car, and you were on your way to the beach house.

you were antsy, not knowing what to expect. if things would be different after the breakup. you didn’t really know if you were truly wanted there. but harrison had been texting you for weeks leading up to this day, so you attempted to shake the worry from your head.

driving towards the beach house, you felt nauseous as your anxiousness stirred in the pit of your stomach. could you handle seeing him again? how would he act towards you?

when you pulled up, you put the car in park and took in the sight of the house. nothing had changed.

memories flickered through your brain from the trip just last year, before you and tom had split. one memory in specific at the forefront of your mind. . .

_**flashback** _

_you ran along the shore of the beach, tom running just behind you in attempts to catch you — but you turn and run into the water instead, squealing._

_“you can’t run from me love,” tom chuckles, catching up easily — even in the water, waves crashing against the two of you as his arms snake around you from behind._

_“i can try,” you smile._

_tom smiles, “yeah?”_

_you turn around to face him, and his hands are cupping your face as he utters his next words — “i’ll never let you get far.”_

_you had felt as if you could cry. knowing what you knew then, that he didn’t. he didn’t know that you had to leave. that you had no intention of hanging back, nor bringing him along._

**_later that evening . . ._ **

_you two had finally made your way back into the beach house. tom now sat on the edge of your bed, and you were standing just in front of him._

_“i have to leave,” you’d told him._

_“me, or the city?” he’d laughed humorlessly._

_“both, you can’t come. i won’t let you, you have a life to live here. with them. with your family,” you speak, and it was the hardest thing you’d ever had to say._

_tom stood up angrily, glaring daggers at you — “so you’re just gonna make a decision for both of us, huh? that’s fucking wrong. all these months together, and this is what you do?”_

_“i didn’t expect you to understand,” you sighed._

_“good. because i don’t,” tom scoffs._

_“i’m sorry, tommy.”_

_he spared you one last glance, filled with anger and hurt — before leaving your room._

**_end flashback_ **

you stepped out of the car, not bothering to get your bags out quite yet. walking around the house, and up the steps of the patio — you came to stand at the railing, overlooking the scenery before you.

the waves crashing against the shore, the slight breeze. the smell of salt — the heat was overwhelming, in the nineties, so you’d worn sandals and a white summer dress, your hair pinned in a messy bun at the top of your head. beads of sweat already traveled down the slope of your neck, and you huffed.

“y/n!” you heard, turning around to see an excited harrison running towards you. you squealed as he picked you up and spun you around, laughing as you embraced him tightly. “i was wondering if you’d really come or not.”

you laughed, “why were you wondering? you know i wouldn’t miss it.”

harrison shrugged, “well. with everything that happened last year. y’know. nothings really been the same since.”

harry stepped outside, grinning at the sight of you. “there she is. i was wondering if you’d make it.”

sighing, you gave him a hug. “yeah, it seems everyone was doubtful as to if i’d come or not,” you shot an accusatory glare in harrison’s direction and he chuckled.

you leaned against the porch railing, completely relaxed and at ease for the first time in awhile.

“i’m probably gonna be grilling out later. so, be ready to eat up,” harrison rubbed his hands together excitedly.

harry chuckled, “good to know our food is gonna be burnt all to shit.”

harrison scoffed, feigning offense. “you know i’m a good cook, you div.”

you couldn’t help but laugh at the two of them. that’s when something else caught your attention.

a car could be heard, pulling into the driveway. followed by two car doors shutting. harrison peeked around the side of the house, and groaned.

“i told him not to do it, but of course. he’s gonna stir some shit anyways,” harrison ran a hand through his hair in a bout of frustration.

you furrowed your brows, clearly not grasping what was about to happen. “what is it?”

that’s when you heard footsteps approaching, a laugh — a girl. when they turned the corner, you saw a girl and tom. you felt your heart beating wildly against the confines of your chest.

you were stunned, but something else boiled beneath the surface. hurt — shock — jealousy.

he still looked as handsome as ever. he had on a hawaiian design button-up shirt, the buttons left undone with his bare chest left on display — toned as ever. his shorts hung low on his hips, and he wore no shoes.

the girl, a blonde with bright blue eyes. she was tan, wearing shorts and a tank-top. with no make-up, she had a natural beauty about her.

tom was too busy laughing at whatever the girl had said, to have noticed you yet.

but when he did, things got very weird — very fast.

tom’s eyes fell on you, and his smile faded from his features. his eyes held a sudden intensity — he seemed emotionless yet, simultaneously as if he would boil over with emotion.

you watched as he quickly regained his composure, the girl eyeing him strangely.

harrison and harry were visibly tense.

you couldn’t help but wonder — why would he do this? surely to get back at you. but part of you had expected better from him.

but maybe you shouldn’t have. after-all, you’d made a choice regarding the relationship the two of you had shared — without giving him a say at all.

you’d done it to save him a world of torment, knowing it’d be hell — trying to maintain a long distance relationship, convinced that your life could never truly align with his.

“what’s up? glad you made it man,” harrison intervenes, determined to take away the awkwardness. he embraced tom, finally breaking the tension.

you finally exhaled, feeling as if you couldn’t breathe mere moments ago.

“who’s this pretty lady?” harry pressed, greeting his brother and his new — what you presumed to be, love interest.

you caught tom’s eyes shifting to you again. “—uh, this is steph. she’s my girlfriend.” he looked away, and so did you.

you turned away from the group, and grabbed onto the railing of the porch. as if you’d need it for some sort of support to stand.

‘girlfriend.’ hearing it, tore you apart.

but you knew you had no right, really. you’d made the decision to let him go.

it was becoming clear that the beach trip this year — was not going to be a fun one.

“hi,” you heard a voice chime next to you, and you turned to see her standing there next to you. “it’s nice to meet you, i’m steph.”

you forced a smile, “hey, i’m y/n.”

“it’s nice to meet you,” she smiled. “how do you know tom and harrison?”

that’s when it dawned on you.

he’d not said a word about you, nor the past that you’d shared.


	2. Chapter 2

there you stood, staring wide-eyed at your ex’s new love interest. shaking yourself out of it, you regained your composure quickly before you gave yourself away.

you’d play along, for now.

“we’re old _friends_ ,” you smiled tightly, and steph smiled thoughtfully.

“that’s neat. kind of glad i’m not the only girl here, if i’m being honest,” steph chimed, laughing softly, the guys laughing and chatting obnoxiously loud in the background.

you sighed, “yeah. they’re something when they get together. that’s for sure,” your smile faded from your lips when tom’s eyes met yours, and you quickly adverted your gaze.

“well um, i should go get my things out of the car,” it was your way of dismissing yourself from the odd situation, unsure of how to interpret anything that was going on.

as you walked out to your car, you couldn’t help but wonder why he hadn’t said a word. there had to be a reason.

maybe it was some sort of twisted way for him to avoid conflict — you didn’t know. but his lack of honesty was dangerous, and their past couldn’t be kept a secret for long.

you were sure there’d be complications this trip, considering you were both going to be forced to tolerate one another . . . and after _everything_ , you doubted it’d end well.

unlocking your car, you opened the door to grab your bags out of the backseat.

“— _wanna tell me what you’re doing here?_ ” you heard suddenly, nearly jumping out of your skin. you turned around, and tom stood there.

somehow, he’d managed to sneak away from the group and followed you.

you huffed in annoyance, trying not to let your eyes admire the sight of him — even as the breeze blew his curls about, and his unbuttoned shirt blew open even more, revealing the sight beneath.

the man could be quite — _distracting_.

his skin was covered in a sheen of sweat, and he was as handsome as ever. you rolled your eyes at him and yourself, you needed to focus.

“attending the yearly beach trip. i’m sorry, am i not welcome here?” was your retort, crossing your arms.

tom scowled at you, “i didn’t really think you’d have the _audacity_ to show your face after dumping me on my ass last year, to be honest.”

rolling your eyes, “oh come on, we’re past that now. _don’t you think?_ i mean, you have a _girlfriend_. she’s nice, but. it’s a shame you haven’t been honest with her.”

this earned a glare from him, “—what are you even—“

“—don’t play dumb, tom. she asked me how you even knew me. i guess what we had wasn’t significant enough to even be mentioned.”

he ran a hand through his hair, clearly frustrated with you.

“i didn’t tell her for a reason, y/n,” tom sighed, looking away from you. you raised a brow at this, his statement stoking your curiosity.

“why didn’t you?” you pressed.

“because,” tom‘s eyes shifted back to you, his emotions playing in his gaze. it made you tense, unsure of what he was getting at. unsure of what would pass through his lips next. “i—“

you shook your head. “save it. it doesn’t matter anymore. you’ve moved on, and you’re happy. focus on that, yeah?” you turned around and gathered your belongings out of your car.

you couldn’t bear to hear anything he had to say, you wouldn’t allow yourself to hear it. because depending on his response, it’d only make things a lot harder for the both of you. 

“ _tommy_?” you heard her soft voice chime, figuring it wouldn’t be long before she’d come searching for him.

you could’ve puked on the spot. that was what you’d called him when you were together. no one else had ever called him that.

“yes, sweetheart?” he answered just as softly.

you didn’t want to witness this any further. you didn’t want to hear anything else out of the pair. it stoked your jealousy and you hated it.

“is everything okay?” she questioned as you shut your car door, watching tom snake his arm around her waist as he glared in your direction.

“doesn’t matter,” he said simply, adverting his eyes from you and back to her — walking away with her as she stared up at him with a questioning gaze.

he’d used your words to fire back at you, and you hated it. you hated how easily he could get under your skin.

“this is getting too weird, too fast.” you sighed to yourself, suddenly feeling overwhelmed.

you hurried inside and up the stairs to one of the unoccupied guest rooms, shutting the door. it had a full size bed, and a relatively large tv mounted on the wall. it was very spacious and airy, you couldn’t complain.

there was even a personal balcony connected to your room. you stepped over to the sliding doors, and opened them. the breeze swept into the room, and you could smell the salt from the ocean. you could hear the waves crashing against the shore.

leaning against the railing of the balcony, you glanced over.

“ugh,” you groaned, seeing tom and steph being affectionate with one another just near the edge of the beach.

that quickly killed the vibe, as you went back inside and began unpacking your things. you went into the bathroom that connected to your room, and sighed as you fixed your hair.

the wind hadn’t been kind to it. you fixed your messy bun, letting loose tendrils dangle around your face. you went as far as to apply some lip gloss and mascara. you weren’t going to apply a ridiculous amount of makeup, you knew the heat would wear it off in no time.

making your way downstairs and into the kitchen, you grabbed a glass and poured yourself some lemonade. stepping outside, you watched as harrison flipped steaks on the grill.

“about time you came out of your shell,” harry piped up, sprawled out in one of the lounge chairs.

harrison glances over, “ah yes, there she is.”

you glared.

“what?” harrison asked, taken aback by your demeanor.

“oh come on. if i would’ve known he was coming, especially with her — i would’ve backed out immediately. you guys didn’t tell me anything,” you sighed, stepping over and sprawling out on one of the lounge chairs just next to harry.

harry chuckled, “to be fair, we didn’t think either of you would show up. _considering_.”

“well, we both did. now this week is going to be a drag,” you sighed, irritated about the fact that you’d have to sit around and watch your ex and his new girl be completely obsessed with one another.

harrison closed the grill, “i don’t see what the issue is, y/n. you dumped him, you moved on. he moved on. why can’t you be civil?” he shrugged.

that’s when you heard a giggle, and saw tom and steph approaching. “drop it,” you snapped quietly, quick to sweep it under the rug.

you couldn’t admit it to anyone else, and you didn’t even want to admit it to yourself — your feelings for him were still very much there.

tom glanced in your direction, before they took a seat at the dining table for the patio area. just next to you and harry.

“what were you guys chatting about?” tom questioned harrison, and he shrugged.

“nothing. where’ve you two been?” harry intervenes, raising a brow at his brother.

“none of your business,” tom snapped.

you rolled your eyes, “that’s just _rude_.”

tom looked over at you almost incredulously, “i’m sorry, _what_?”

harrison sighed, you could’ve sworn you’d heard him mutter ‘ _here we go_.’

“i said that’s just rude. you being snippy for absolutely no reason,” you explained confidently. you wouldn’t be intimidated by him.

tom laughed humorlessly, “i’m sorry, y/n. i didn’t realize you were a part of the conversation. wasn’t really talking to you.”

steph tried to interrupt, in what you assumed was an attempt to diffuse the situation, “—guys, lets just—“

you felt your blood starting to boil, “— _you know what?_ i’m sick of—“

“hey! dude, sorry i’m late,” you all were broken out of your heated daze. a guy having approached out of nowhere. he hugged harrison, so you assumed he was a friend of his.

“so glad you made it man,” harrison laughed, “—this is jake. you already know harry, and tom—“

“—unfortunately,” you heard tom mutter, and you wondered why he had such disdain for the guy.

harrison continued, “—that’s tom’s girlfriend steph, and this is y/n.”

you watched as jake’s eyes fell on you, and you smiled sweetly. time seemed to pause for a moment, and he stepped over and shook your hand.

“nice to meet you,” you spoke softly.

“the pleasure is all mine,” jake grinned, winking at you. he looked away from you, and to harrison. “i’m gonna go unpack, i’ll be down soon.”

when he disappeared out of sight, you were just as startled as steph when tom snapped. “you fucking invited jake?”

harrison scowled in his direction, “he’s a friend. relax, quit acting like such a div.”

“—looks like he’s got the hots for y/n,” harry nudged you, and you rolled your eyes at him.

“shut up, will you?” you scoffed in amusement.

you spared a glance in tom’s direction, and you noticed how tense he was over jake’s appearance. but he seemed to grow even more pressed at his interest in you.

but why?

steph tried to calm her fuming boyfriend, your ex. but her methods weren’t exactly effective, as he brushed her off of him. tom’s focus remained on you, fuming over jake’s arrival. . . and something else.

you couldn’t place it. he seemed almost — jealous? the hurt played on steph’s features and she was quick to dismiss herself and disappear inside.

“shit,” tom cursed — aware that he’d messed up it seemed, heading inside after her, you assumed.

harrison sighed, clearly stressed.

it was only day one of the trip.


	3. Chapter 3

an hour had passed, and now everyone was seated at the table on the patio. an umbrella sat just in the middle, keeping the sun away.

harrison had finally finished cooking. you each had a steak, baked potato, salad and a roll. you knew it’d be a delicious meal, and you couldn’t wait to dive in.

that is, if you didn’t lose your appetite first. tom and steph were seated just across the table from you, all over one another. you were tempted to say something.

you bit your tongue instead, determined to keep your cool. it wasn’t hard to tell that you’d both stressed harrison out.

“what do you guys wanna do later?” jake piped up, just next to you.

multiple ideas crossed your mind, but you weren’t quick to choose.

“how about a little poolside party? with drinks?” tom suggested, and you rolled your eyes as you took another bite of your food.

harrison nodded, “i’m down. we can invite a few more guests, too. make it more fun,” he grinned, wagging his brows.

you didn’t object, and you knew if you did, it’d merely start another argument.

a few hours had passed, and the sun was beginning to set. you had excused yourself, going to your room a couple hours prior.

you’d taken a shower, letting your hair fall around your shoulders. you’d applied light makeup — waterproof mascara and a lipgloss, considering the fact that you’d be swimming.

you’d decided on your black bikini, not bothering to slip anything on over it. heading out of your room and towards the party, you tried to take deep breaths.

the closer you got, the louder the music became. the more voices you heard. when you reached the bottom of the stairs, you gasped.

there were a lot of people standing around, music thudding throughout the house. this wasn’t what you were expecting, and at first it was a bit overwhelming.

you made your way outside, finding harrison standing by the pool — clad only in his swimming trunks, laughing obnoxiously loud at something someone had just said, you assumed.

“what is all of this? i thought you said a _few_ people?” you questioned, eyes wide.

harrison shrugged, “i figured why not go all out?” with two drinks in his hand, one unopened and one halfway gone, he handed you the unopened one. “ _relax_ , y/n.”

a drink wouldn’t hurt. you began sipping at yours, casually engaging in the conversation with harrison and the surrounding people.

little did you know, one drink would turn into three. you felt woozy, but still coherent. you knew you’d regret it in the morning.

now you were standing with jake and a couple of his friends, laughing aloud. that’s when your eyes caught his figure in your peripheral vision.

tom was seated nearby, in a black tee and black jeans, boots and his hat. his sharp jawline on display, his features seemingly tense.

steph was seated on his knee, stirring some sort of heat inside of you. it wasn’t a sight you enjoyed seeing. his eyes caught yours, and you were quick to turn around.

you clutched at the drink in your hand tightly, the anxiousness setting in.

“so, y/n. what happened between you and tom?” jake suddenly pressed, and you assumed that he’d caught you staring at tom when you shouldn’t have been.

“don’t wanna talk about it,” you dismissed quickly, pressing your lips in a tight line. you suddenly felt nervous.

“why not? that bad, huh?” jake chuckled, clearly not respecting your wishes to not discuss it.

you glared, “i _said_ , i _don’t_ wanna talk about it.” you turned to storm off, but jake was quick to grab your arm.

turning around, you stared at him incredulously. “let go of me.”

jake seemingly, reluctantly, let go of you. “relax. i didn’t mean to set you off, alright?”

you sighed, attempting to relax. you decided to let it go, unless he tried to test you again.

sparing a glance in tom’s direction, steph was nowhere to be found. he was seated with his friends, but his eyes were set in your direction. he looked very irritated.

shaking your head, you redirected your attention to jake. when you turned back to him though, he was towering over you. his face hovering close to yours. “what are you doing?” you asked.

“i could make you forget all about him,” jake grins, his hands were on your waist suddenly, and you felt your breath hitch.

your lips were just barely an inch apart, and you don’t know when his hands traveled along the slope of your back, but they had. his hands squeezed the round of your ass suddenly, and you pushed away from him.

“what are you doing?” you hissed, repeating yourself.

jake didn’t seem phased, smiling, “i thought you liked me too, y/n. _c’mon_.” he swooped in, to kiss you — you assumed.

he never made it that far. jake was suddenly shoved into the wall, a loud thud that caught plenty of attention.

you gasped as you watched tom attack jake, punching him in the face and throwing him to the ground.

“didn’t she tell you to leave her alone?” tom barked, anger flowing off of him in waves.

jake had the audacity to laugh, laying on his back, blood seeping from his lip — he looked like a drunken, incoherent mess. “damn, dude. sorry. didn’t realize she was yours,” he teased, pushing himself to stand again. “oh that’s right. _she’s not._ ”

tom swung at him again, landing a hit across his jaw. that’s when jake retaliated, hitting tom in the stomach. you could only watch in horror, stunned by the situation.

“doesn’t matter. a lady tells you not to touch her, _don’t fucking touch her_ ,” tom practically growled. “don’t touch her like that _ever_ again.”

“or what?” jake instigated, stoking his anger.

“ _tom_!” you pressed, afraid to intervene. “tom stop it, right now!”

tom had him on the ground again, landing blows — clearly not paying attention to you or anyone. he despised the guy to begin with, you knew. but especially now.

“break this shit up right now!” harrison pushed through the crowd, yanking tom up off of jake by his arm. tom yanked away from his bestfriend, glaring. harrison shook his head, “the hell has gotten into you?”

“alright everyone, back to what you were doing!” harry yelled, trying to break the attention off of you all — dismissing himself with harrison following behind.

jake had limped away with them, and you assumed he needed to tend to his wounds.

“ _tom_ ,” you breathed, taken aback by his behavior. why had he come to your rescue? and why was he so angry about it?

tom’s attention shifted to you, and his eyes were clouded with anger — and something else, something you couldn’t place. you felt overwhelmed, standing there with him.

everything else blended out around the both of you. he stood so close, and his scent hit you so suddenly — masculine and strong.

you missed his touch, his smell. you missed all of him, you couldn’t lie. but he wasn’t yours to have, not anymore.

“stay away from him, y/n.” tom spoke finally, and you weren’t sure if it was a demand, or a warning. he walked away then, and left you standing there shaken.

you weren’t having it, as you followed after him through the sea of people. tom didn’t halt in his steps until he made it to his room, and he stormed in — you on his heels.

“you should be downstairs,” tom bites.

you scoff, “i’m aware. but you’re off the rails.”

tom chuckles, facing you, “i’m off the rails? clearly _you_ are. hanging with the likes of him!”

you stare at him incredulously, “excuse me? i can hang with whoever i want—“

“what did you do? come on this trip to stoke old feelings? torment me?” tom yells, his arms in the air.

“you’re one to ask questions! you brought steph!” you scowl.

tom combs his fingers through his hair, “my apologies,” he replies sarcastically, “didn’t realize you gave a damn anymore.”

you glare, “oh, fuck you.”

“—no. fuck _you_ , darling,” tom replies coldly as he approaches you, invading your space carelessly.

you stare up at him, eyes filled with emotion, his gaze just as intense as your own. tom’s breathing labored like yours. the urge to touch him, to crash your lips against his own very much present. but you wouldn’t.

taking steps backwards as if to put space between the two of you, tom follows. every two steps you take backwards, tom takes one towards you. soon your back is against his door.

“— _tom_ ,” your tone full of warning. unsure of what his intentions were.

tom rests the palms of his hands against the door on either side of your head, pinning you between it and his body.

his breathing had quieted, but the anger still pooled in his eyes — and something else. tom’s eyes travel from your eyes, to your lips — and lower. that’s when you remember the fact that you’re in a bikini.

you suddenly feel bare, noticing the way his eyes linger on your cleavage, before shifting back to your gaze. he moves a hand, his fingers toying with the knot at the back of your neck — the one that’s holding your top in place.

one of tom’s fingers hook under one of the straps of your top, running it along your skin — stopping just above your breast, pulling against it and letting it snap against your skin.

“— _tom_...”

“stay away from him,” tom repeats his warning.

you study his face, completely breathless, “or _what_? you’ll get mad and beat his ass again?”

“maybe,” tom shrugs, no amusement evident. clearly serious and against you being around the guy. not that you cared to be after what he’d done tonight. “he’s bad news. i don’t want him near you.”

“you don’t get to decide who’s around me anymore,” you reply, your eyes searching his — noticing how his gaze shifts to your lips and back to meet your own.

“i — i have to go,” you swallow thickly, the tension too much. eyeing him as you waited for him to move.

tom seemed to hesitate, and you pushed against his chest — trying to ignore the way his toned chest felt against your palms,

and he finally moved, and you quickly turned and fled from his room.

you sighed, heading to your room. you showered and dressed in your pajamas, before climbing into bed and putting in your headphones.

you tried not to think too much on what had just happened with tom. the tension between you was threatening to snap.

listening to music, you tossed and turned. it was nearly impossible to sleep. nearly an hour or so had passed, and you were close to giving up.

tugging your earphones out of your ears, you sat up. deciding on going downstairs to get some sort of snack.

when you opened your bedroom door, the house was pretty dark and relatively quiet. the party had ended at some point, after you’d retired to your room for the evening.

you crept downstairs, hearing the tv in the living room. you glanced around the corner but no one was even in the room, and you found that to be strange.

when you approached the kitchen, you heard movement and paused. you peeked around the corner, and you saw jake — making out with some girl.

you nearly scoffed, but reminded yourself to keep quiet. you didn’t want to let on that you were anywhere around. you were disgusted. he was clearly there for a good time, but he wouldn’t be getting a good time out of you.

“jake—“ the girl whined, and you cringed. you were about to head back to your room, when they shifted and you caught sight of her face.

you nearly threw up. you felt your heart drop. you felt as if the world was spinning around you all of a sudden.

it was _steph_.


	4. Chapter 4

you were in your room, trying not to panic. what you’d seen, couldn’t be unseen. you knew now, and you were the only one that did. you’d seen jake making out with tom’s girlfriend. 

stepping out onto the balcony connected to your room, you leaned against the railing — trying to collect yourself.

you had to tell him....didn’t you? would he even believe you?

you tried to focus on the waves crashing against the shore, the salty smell of the ocean breeze. anything to find your grounding.

“y/n,” you heard suddenly, nearly jumping out of your skin. turning around, you sighed in relief. harrison was standing there, leaning in the doorway.

“ever heard of knocking? holy shit. i didn’t know who’d snuck into my room,” you breathed, your heart still beating in a panic.

harrison stared out at the ocean, remaining silent. you watched him, unsure of what he was coming to you about. had he seen what you’d just seen?

“he still loves you, y’know?” harrison finally spoke, and your face dropped.

you frowned, “don’t do this. don’t come to me, speaking on his behalf. i know he’s your bestfriend, but it’s not any of my business, harrison. really it’s—“

“i saw it tonight. the way he reacted over jake making a move on you. he hasn’t reacted to anything like that, ever,” harrison continued, regardless of your objection, “he was willing to do harm, to protect you and defend you. tom has never been like that before.” 

you shrugged, still unsure of what to think of the entire situation. you remained silent, looking away from harrison now.

“i had a talk with jake, he won’t be bothering you again,” he sighed. you tensed at the name.

“oh. okay,” you spoke quietly.

harrison looked at you strangely, and you stared back at him with your lips pressed together in a thin line.

“what’s the matter?” harrison questioned, and you shook your head quickly. “don’t bullshit me y/n. i know you better than most.”

“it’s steph, harrison,” you finally confessed. you looked at him, eyes full of worry and stress. you felt bad for tom, and you felt bad for keeping it to yourself.

“what about steph?” he pressed.

“she’s....i um. well. i went downstairs earlier after everyone had gone to bed and jake was in the kitchen. with steph,” you sighed, “kissing steph. they were kissing.” it wasn’t your best formation of words, but you’d managed. 

harrison froze, and stared at you with his brows furrowed, before looking away. almost as if he were putting the pieces together in his head. 

“what is it?” you asked.

“that girl is trouble and i knew it. and so is that div,” harrison huffed, before realization struck his features, “oh shit, tom. tom doesn’t know.”

you considered for a moment. “should we...should we tell him?” 

harrison nodded, “well of course. he deserves to know. but you should tell him, you saw it y/n.”

you stared at him wide-eyed for a fleeting moment, before laughing. “good one. as if he’d believe me. c’mon, harrison. be realistic.”

harrison simply stared at you, all jokes aside. he was serious, and that’s what scared you the most. 

how could you tell him? how could you watch his heart break all over again? you know he deserved the truth, but you knew what it’d do to him.

“it’s the right thing to do, and you know it,” harrison pressed, turning away. “goodnight y/n,” he spoke quietly, leaving your room. 

you eventually climbed back into bed, tossing and turning throughout the night. you managed to get sleep here and there, but not much.

all that played in your head was the image of steph, with her hands all over jake. then the images of her with tom. something within you stirred — anger. how dare she? he didn’t deserve such treatment.

you hadn’t exactly been kind to him either. but the entirety of your relationship with tom — a whole year and two months, was spent wonderfully. separating yourself from him wasn’t the best move, but you’d done it anyhow. 

when the sun came up, you climbed out of bed. you couldn’t take it anymore. you walked to tom’s room, that he was sharing with steph. you hesitated before knocking. 

a few moments passed, before the doorknob turned and you were met with a shirtless — sleepy tom. when he saw it was you, he sighed. “is there a reason you’ve woken me up at this time of morning?”

you nodded, “actually....yeah. i need to talk to you, in private.”

tom ran a hand through his messy hair, as if to tame it. “steph isn’t here. i woke up and she wasn’t here, sent me a text saying she went out shopping with jake and harry, and one of her girl friends.”

you scoffed to yourself. of course he’d woken up and she wasn’t there, she’d probably been wrapped up with jake all night.

he turned away from you and stepped inside. you took that as an invitation, stepping inside behind him and shutting the door. 

it was hard not to focus on his bare chest, his exposed body. his pajama pants hanging low on his hips. he turned around to face you, standing only a few inches from you.

the close proximity was nearly overwhelming. “what did you wanna talk about?” tom finally asked. your eyes widened and you felt as if your throat was tightening. how could you even say it?

“it’s um, it’s about steph,” you managed. 

tom laughed, “of course it is.”

you frowned, “don’t be like that.”

“like what, y/n!” tom shouted, suddenly upset. “what? you don’t like her? you don’t approve of her? well too fucking bad. you don’t care anymore, remember?” 

you were stunned, not expecting things to take such a turn. “that’s not....that’s not what i needed to talk about. and i never said I didn’t care. i left, but i didn’t stop giving a shit. don’t even.” 

tom glared, approaching you. “you left like what we had didn’t mean a damn thing to you, y/n. spare me of your bullshit for once.” 

“i left for my own reasons,” you argued in an attempt to defend yourself.

“doesn’t justify anything, darling,” tom pressed. you rolled your eyes.

your back was against the door, no space left between the two of you. “i’m not your darling, not anymore—“ 

silence fell between the both of you, and you stared at one another. you could’ve sworn you heard footsteps approaching, but you weren’t entirely certain.

that’s when there was a knock at the door, and your eyes widened. 

tom placed a hand over your mouth suddenly. you stared up at him with furrowed brows and a questioning gaze. 

“yeah?” tom yelled, both of you unsure of who was on the other side of the door. 

“was just checking on you mate,” you heard harrison’s voice and tom’s eyes caught yours. you were able to feel his breath fanning over your face, your noses barely an inch from one another.

“oh, ‘m fine. just getting up, i’ll be down soon,” tom answered. 

“alright. have you seen y/n? she’s not in her room. i don’t think she went out with the others,” harrison pressed further.

“haven’t seen her this morning. maybe she’s outside,” tom dismisses, and it’s silent for a moment. you squeeze your eyes shut, hoping that he’s not picking up on anything. 

“i’ll check. i’ll be downstairs!” harrison finally answers, and you soon hear his footsteps growing more faint as he disappears downstairs.

when you open your eyes, tom is still standing there. his hand falls from your mouth, and his nose nearly brushes yours. your eyes shift to his lips for a moment. 

it was almost the same predicament as the one you’d found yourself in with him last night.

“what is it you wanted to talk about, y/n?” tom spoke casually, pulling away from you and breaking the haze.

he turned away from you, and you stared after him sadly. it was now or never.

“she’s...her and jake. i saw them last night. in the kitchen, making out,” you spoke finally.

tom turned around suddenly, clearly taken aback. emotions crossing his features faster than you could keep up. 

“what?” he spoke finally.

“she’s cheating on you,” you spoke clearly, and simply. 

tom stared at you in disbelief. “that’s not cool, y/n.” 

shaking your head in confusion, “what isn’t cool?”

tom laughed softly, adjusting his pants, “is this some sort of sad attempt at you breaking us up?” 

you felt your heart drop, and you shook your head. “i’m being honest with you, tom.”

this was what you were afraid of. that he wouldn’t believe you. this was why you’d told harrison that there was no way he’d trust you in this.

tom shook his head, “i’m not dealing with this.” 

you stared at him pleadingly. “i’m just trying to do what’s right. i know what i saw, and i wouldn’t lie to you. this isn’t some sort of sick joke to me. tom, please—“

“stop this, y/n. this is ridiculous.”

“what’s ridiculous is you not trusting me more than that,” you scoffed, shaking your head.

tom shakes his head, “what do you expect? you left, y/n. you fucking left—“

“i know!”

“—then you should understand why it’s hard to fucking trust you!” tom snaps.

“i get it. you’re never gonna forgive me. but don’t say i didn’t warn you,” you sigh in defeat.

you turned on your heel and left his room, walking into your own and locking the door behind you. part of you didn’t even want to come out for the rest of the day. 

it was what you’d expected the situation to be like, but you’d hoped for a better outcome. it hurt, that he didn’t have a trace of trust for you. 

you were just about to sit on the edge of the bed when there was a knock at your door, and you sighed. when you opened it, harrison stood in the doorway. 

you looked at him sadly. 

“where’ve you been? i’ve been looking for you. was starting to worry....what’s wrong?” harrison questioned, as tears welled in your eyes.

“he didn’t believe me.”


	5. Chapter 5

harrison had sat with you in your room, letting you cry it out on his shoulder. part of you had believed — had hoped, that he’d believe you. for his own sake.

but he didn’t, and it hurt your heart.

you found comfort in harrison’s company, the only other person that knew of this. when the others returned home, he finally dismissed himself to go and see what was up with the group.

finding the courage to go downstairs was the hardest part. you didn’t even want to bother, not wanting to face steph, and not wanting to face tom especially.

“hey y/n!” you heard all of a sudden, just outside your door. quickly identifying the voice — it was harry.

“yeah?” you answered unenthusiastically, not bothering to move from your spot on the bed.

“we’re all going out on the beach. wanna come?” he asked. you knew it was a genuine invitation, but you were hesitant.

you sighed, “i might come along.”

“hope to see you out there,” harry replies, before you hear his footsteps growing fainter.

you hopped up off of your bed, stepping into your bathroom. you tied your hair in a messy knot at the top of your head, loose tendrils dangling around your face.

pulling on your white bikini, you sprayed a minimal amount of sunscreen on your skin. you hated the feel of it, finding it to be ridiculously sticky and annoying.

in that same moment, you heard your door open and close. freezing in your spot, you watched as harrison appeared around the corner.

“i’m gonna have to start locking my door. everyone knocks but you,” you scoffed, rolling your eyes at him. you were eyeing yourself in the mirror.

“you’re right, but. it’s been hell trying to get you out of your nest,” he teased. referring to how you’ve been so isolated, you assumed.

you glared, “did you come to drag me out of it?”

harrison grinned, shrugging. “actually, yes.”

in that same moment, he dived forwards and you were tossed over his shoulder. you squealed.

“put me down!” you laughed, watching the ground as he walked. he seemed to do it effortlessly, walking down the staircase and out towards the beach. “you’re such an ass.”

“you love me,” harrison chuckled, “i’m not gonna let you hide away forever y/n.”

you watched as he finally stepped into sand, and he didn’t quit walking. the sun was scorching hot as you presumed it’d be.

“what are you doing? put me down!” you pushed against his frame, desperate to be freed. you knew what his intentions were. “if you drag me into that cold water i swear to god.”

harrison was silent, and you kicked and flailed as he stepped into shallow waters.

“do it!” you heard harry, and you looked up to see them tossing a volleyball. harry, jake — steph and tom. all watching you and harrison.

“shut up, you ass! don’t encourage him!” you whined.

that’s when he went deeper into the water, tossing you from over his shoulder. you landed not-so-gracefully in the water, but fortunately you didn’t fully go under.

you didn’t exactly want to deal with the burn of the salty water up your nose and in your eyes.

you glared at harrison, who stared in amusement. you splashed at him mercilessly, multiple times.

“alright! alright alright!” harrison surrendered. and you grinned, showing him some mercy. you made your way towards the shore, looking over in tom’s direction.

tom was watching you, until he saw you look his way. he quickly adverted his eyes, tossing the ball around in his hands before throwing it harshly at his brother.

“you div!” harry groaned, “that hurt.”

“good,” tom remarked snippily.

you watched as harry seemingly struggled with himself, wanting to confront his brother and his sudden attitude.

“why don’t we play some volleyball?” harrison quickly suggested, and you became tense. you’d never really been good at sports. “y/n, tom and me on one team — steph, jake and harry on the other.”

tom was quick to look at his bestfriend incredulously, and harrison glared. you watched as tom clenched his jaw tightly, but didn’t say a word.

you stepped over to the net with everyone else, taking your place. you stood in the back, harrison to your right — just in front of you, and in front of him — tom stood to his left.

anxiousness twisted your gut, as you tossed the ball up, giving it a good hit. the ball went back and forth between harrison and jake, for a good bit. harrison landed one more blow, and jake missed.

the game went on like that for a good while, tom and harrison holding up the team very well.

you gave harrison a high five, grinning happily at your teams succession. it was your turn to serve yet again, this time though — when you hit the ball, it smacked tom in the back of the head, harshly.

tom snapped around, “you fucking serious, y/n?”

you looked at him, startled. it hadn’t been intentional. but you knew that he’d already been irritable, and you’d really just set it off.

“my bad,” you scoffed.

“as if that wasn’t on purpose. seriously y/n,” tom scowled, glaring in your direction.

harrison rolled his eyes, “can you two just stop it?”

“no! i’m tired of this,” tom snapped at his bestfriend, “she’s had an issue with me ever since we split!”

your eyes widened at this. steph wasn’t aware of your relationship at all, and she stormed off suddenly. 

“shit!” tom shouted, realizing this — watching as she walked off, before his attention shifted back to you.

“will you just calm down! i’m not out to get you!” you scoffed, trying to get him to understand this.

“you aren’t?” tom laughed humorlessly, “because i didn’t forget that little story you tried to tell me this morning, the one where you tried to sabotage my relationship. what are you, jealous? is that it, y/n?”

that’s when you started growing upset, because you couldn’t lie — seeing them together stoked something inside of you, something along the lines of jealousy. but also, you were trying to protect him.

“you keep thinking i’m against you! i can hardly stand this anymore!” you shrieked, up to your neck with the entire ordeal.

“you shouldn’t have come then, darling,” tom shrugged carelessly, walking past you and towards the house.

you looked back at the group, that watched with eyes full of concern. harrison just looked fed up with the both of you, and you sighed.

turning on your heel, you ran after tom.

when you caught up to him, he was headed towards his car.

“where are you going?” you pressed, following closely behind.

“anywhere but here,” tom answered simply.

“please just—“

tom stopped, turning around to face you. “please just what, y/n? please just listen to you? please just hear you out and believe you?” tom stepped closer and closer to you, into your personal space. you were overwhelmed, “ _you_ left _me_. why would you even care, y/n?”

“because i do,” you stared up into his eyes, his gaze full of conflict and emotion. you felt your chest tighten up at the closeness. “ _please_.”

you felt your eyes watering, and you watched his features but they remained emotionless, unmoving. he eyed your face, his eyes shifting to your lips for a brief moment.

“i can’t,” tom shook his head, moving away from you.

“what is it gonna take for you to believe me! you’re gonna get hurt!” you cry, reaching out for him and stopping him — your hand around his wrist.

tom pauses, looking at your hand on his arm. “i’ll find out for myself.”

“— _tommy_!” you attempt, calling him what you used to when you had dated. it was his weakest spot — at least it used to be.

it caught him off guard, you noticed. his gaze shifting to yours — emotions flickering behind his eyes.

“ _damn it_ , y/n,” tom growls in frustration, snapping suddenly, lunging towards you — causing you to tense as his nose brushes yours.

you were frozen in your spot, until his lips crashed against yours — and you hummed in surprise, and at the feel of his lips on yours. it was a feeling you’d almost forgotten.

tom’s hands were on your waist, and your back slammed against the side of his car — his body molding against yours as his hands traveled around your waist and down your back — his hands groping your ass, and you moaned against his lips.

his hands moved quickly, back to your front where he groped your breasts through your top. you felt his arousal pressing against your thigh, and you gasped.

the heat of the car against your bare skin did little to phase you — caught up in the heat of the moment.

tom seemed to break out of his haze, and he jerked away from you suddenly.

“ _shit_ —“ he cursed, realizing what he’d just done. and you realized just the same.

you ran your fingers over your lips, realizing that neither of you were any better than jake or steph.

tom walked away from you, towards the house this time. you followed him yet again. unsure of what his intentions were.

“i don’t want you to get hurt, you’ve gotta listen to me! tom!” you tried, attempting to grab his attention.

“as if we didn’t just complicate things enough!” tom scoffs, shaking his head at you.

when he stepped into the house, he froze in his footsteps. you looked in confusion, hearing footsteps approaching. you turned to see harrison and harry returning from the beach, and your gaze shifted back to tom.

when you came up behind him, you gasped softly. there stood jake, wrapped up with steph in the kitchen. he was comforting her — his lips brushing against hers as his hands ran along her back.


	6. Chapter 6

you were speechless. after everything you’d been trying to tell tom, and after tom not listening to a word you had to say — he’d found out for himself.

panic flooded your system, knowing that this situation wasn’t going to unfold very well.

steph and jake were so tied up with one another, that they hadn’t noticed you or anyone else.

“what the fuck is going on here?” tom spits suddenly, his accent laced with boiling anger.

you watched as steph jumped away from jake rather quickly, attempting to regain composure. jake seemingly unbothered.

“tom, i can explain,” steph sighs.

“can you? i’d love to hear what sort of explanation you have for this. for fucking cheating on me!” tom yelled, stepping closer to the pair.

you glanced over your shoulder at harrison, and he looked at you wide-eyed, his eyes shifting back to tom.

“i suggest you stop yelling at her dude,” jake intervenes, stepping in front of steph as if to protect and guard her. this didn’t settle well with tom.

tom chuckled. “yeah? or what?”

“cut the shit, tom. i stole your girlfriend and fucked her, and i’ve been treating her like she deserves, because you wouldn’t,” jake scoffed, “i’m gonna assume it’s because you still aren’t over y/n leaving you. guess you couldn’t please her either. maybe i’ll fuck y/n too.”

that’s when tom swung, a sickening hit to jake’s face. blood started seeping from one of his nostrils. jake tried to swing back at tom, but tom blocked it and landed a hit to his stomach.

determined to fight tom, jake tackled tom to the floor. he tried so hard to get a hit in, but tom was stronger than him. driven by his rage.

tom had him pinned down in moments, landing hits.

you gasped, in panic. you reached for tom, anything to get his attention. “tom, you’ve gotta stop! c’mon!”

tom yanked away from you in anger, but it broke him out of his violent haze. he climbed off of jake who was beaten and battered.

“you’re a piece of shit for that. you’ve always been a piece of shit, and that’s why you can do whatever you want. but if you lay a finger on y/n, i’ll do a lot more damage. i promise.” tom practically growled. “get the fuck out,” tom looked from jake to steph, “the both of you.”

you were shaken, watching as tom stormed off. he’d threatened someone over you. even though he’d acted spiteful and mean, so far during the trip.

shaking your head, you turned to look at harry and harrison.

“well,” harry shrugged.

harrison sighed, “guess the cats out of the bag, eh?”

you rolled your eyes, shaking your head at the both of them. you couldn’t help but be worried for tom at the moment, how he could possibly be feeling.

“can’t say i really liked her in the first place. i knew something was off with that girl,” harry shook his head.

harrison nodded, “me and y/n knew that this was going on. but tom wouldn’t believe anyone.”

harry looked at you both, as if he were offended. “you what? and you didn’t tell me!”

“in our defense it’s been a long few days. we were so focused on getting him to open his eyes, that we weren’t focused on anything else,” you sighed.

“next time, don’t leave me out of something like that!” harry huffed.

harrison chuckled, “alright, alright!”

you quickly made your way out of the kitchen, and up to your room. wanting to get out of dodge. not wanting to deal with another round of conflict.

time passed, and steph and jake had packed their bags and cleared the area. you couldn’t be more glad.

there weren’t any more secrets, any more tension, at least to your knowledge.

as night fell, you felt the strong desire to relax after the day you’d had. no one had seen tom, and he hadn’t emerged from his room since.

you didn’t want to bother him, unsure of his current state. you knew he’d come around.

the house was silent, and you crept down the hallway in your bathing suit. when you got to the patio doors, you slowly opened and shut the doors behind you. the slight warm breeze crept across your skin, and you sighed.

you wanted to go for a late night swim, anything to distract you from the madness going on lately.

“what are you doing?” you heard suddenly. you’d nearly screamed. tom was in the pool, all you could see was his head as he swam around.

“well, i was gonna have a late night swim. just to wind down but, i didn’t know anyone else would be out here,” you explained, clutching your towel close to your chest.

tom didn’t say anything, and you were unsure of if you should leave him be, or to join.

a few moments passed, both of you silent. before tom finally spoke, “you don’t have to go back inside, y/n. it’s alright.”

he nearly sounded amused at your startled and uncertain behavior.

you nodded, placing your towel down on a chair. stepping towards the stairs that led into the pool, you cautiously dipped your foot in.

the water was warm, thankfully. and you easily stepped deeper into the water, until you were floating around just as he was.

glancing at tom, you found that he was looking at you from across the pool. it made you feel nervous, but it simultaneously made your heart flutter.

“are you...y’know, doing okay? after today?” you questioned, even though you knew it may not be the best idea.

“just fine,” tom answers simply, seemingly dismissing the topic.

you sighed, “you don’t have to pretend to be okay. not around me.”

tom remained silent, and even though you knew he didn’t feel like discussing things, you pressed further.

“what was jake talking about? with steph, and with me? what triggered you so badly?” you questioned.

“none of your fucking business, y/n,” tom snapped suddenly, hurting your feelings. but you didn’t relent.

“it had to do with me, so i think it is my business,” you scoffed.

tom glared, “you don’t know when to leave it alone, do you?” shaking his head, he made his way to exit the pool.

“i’m just asking you a question, what’s your problem?” you asked, shaken by his behavior.

tom was silent for a moment. “i didn’t _like_ her, i didn’t _love_ her. i didn’t _have sex_ with her. my _head_ nor my _heart_ was where it _should’ve_ _been_. what she did doesn’t phase me one bit, if i’m being honest. so, i’m over it. alright? leave it alone.”

shaking your head, you stared in confusion. it didn’t add up. why would he have been with her if that were the case?

as he stepped out of the pool in his swimming trunks, drying his hair with his towel, his brown strands were a mess atop of his head. his toned body glistened with drops of water.

you shook yourself out of it. “then why bring her around? why waste so much time on her?”

tom ignored you, clearly fuming at this rate. but you couldn’t stop prying.

you started to make your way out of the pool, and you started to approach him. “answer me.”

tom watched then, as you approached him. shamelessly eyeing your body up, before his fiery gaze caught yours. “because i needed a fucking distraction, y/n. alright? that’s it.”

you furrowed your brows as you considered what he said.

“a distraction from what?” you asked, standing in front of him now. his gaze never left yours, and you were overwhelmed with the intensity. the effects of the close proximity.

“from you.”


	7. Chapter 7

you stood there in front of tom, unmoving. he’d just admitted to you that he’d brought steph around, because he needed a distraction from you.

it was unclear all this time, if tom was over you or not. and when he’d brought steph on the beach trip, you were convinced that maybe he’d finally moved on.

but now you knew the truth. as tom stood there, staring down at you with his fiery gaze. it was all too familiar.

the way he would get so irritable, so quickly. especially with you, and how difficult you could be. this you were aware of, and you knew it was one of the things that pulled him in more. 

“from me?” you questioned, eyes slightly wide.

tom looked away from you, glaring off into the distance. “what’s so hard for you to understand, y/n?” his voice became softer, his accent lacing every word in the sweetest way.

“what? are you still in love with me?” you teased, laughing softly. this unnerved him further, as his face turned back to you, his eyes now glaring into yours. 

tom scoffed, “i’m glad it’s a joke to you,” he shook his head, turning to walk away from you.

impulsively almost, you reached out and grabbed his wrist to stop him. he yanked away as if you’d burned him. “it was a mistake. coming on this trip,” tom speaks up, before disappearing inside. 

you stood there shaken, unsure of what to do. unsure of what to believe, and where to go from there. 

instead of dwelling on it any further, as late as it already was, you made your way to your room. after a hot shower, you crawled into your bed and got as cozy as you could.

when morning came, you didn’t want to get out of your bed. last night made you nervous about being around tom, after the way things had gone. 

climbing out of bed, you put on your bathing suit top, pulled on the bottoms, and pulled a pair of shorts on to cover your lower half at least.

fixing your hair, you put it in a neat bun atop of your head, loose tendrils hanging around your ears and face. 

when you went downstairs, you noticed harrison and harry on the patio. the smell of coffee clouded your senses, and you couldn’t resist fixing yourself a mug. 

you stepped out onto the patio, inhaling the ocean breeze. it was a cloudy day, cooler than it had been before.

“you wanna explain to me what’s going on?” harrison immediately pressed, his head turned in your direction. sunglasses hid his gaze from you, but you knew he was giving you that inquisitive stare.

“you wanna tell me what you’re referring to?” you asked, unsure of what he was getting at.

“tom was ready to leave this morning. he acted like his ass was on fire. i nearly couldn’t stop him. i convinced him to stay until tonight, and when i asked him why he had to go, he said he needed to get away from you,” harrison clarified. 

you swallowed thickly. 

“he told us a little bit about the run in you two had last night,” harry added.

you nodded, smiling tightly, “of course he did.”

“you two have to face the past you shared eventually, y’know? can’t run from that shit forever. it’ll destroy you both,” harrison sighed, sipping from his mug, “only saying it because i care.”

as if on cue, tom came around the house clad in only his swimming trunks. when he saw you, he paused. 

the eye contact made you tense, it made your heart jump in your chest. the resentment was still evident in his gaze. he was still upset with you.

as if you weren’t even standing there, he made his way across the porch and into the house. 

“anyone else feel the tension?” harry muttered, nearly under his breath.

you glared in his direction, “will you shut it?”

“that’s it! we’re going to a club tonight. we’re going to dance and drink off some of this tension, and we’re going to get along,” harrison erupted suddenly, determined to have a breakthrough.

you furrowed your brows, “but isn’t he going home later?” 

“he’s not going home until this shit is settled, until there’s no more resentment and hostility in the air,” harrison huffed, setting down his glass on the table.

you rolled your eyes. you didn’t really see how tom would let that happen, too resentful and angry towards you.

deciding to leave it be, you went into your room. once again isolating yourself, turning on the tv. you watched a couple movies, allowed a few hours to pass, before you drifted off. 

later on, a knock at your door made you jolt up, nearly falling off the bed.

“what?” you huffed, tiredness still evident in your tone.

“what do you mean what! we’re leaving. i’m gonna leave the address on the table for you, when you’re finished getting ready. meet us there!” harrison pressed, clearly irritated that you weren’t exactly running on time.

climbing out of bed, you took a quick shower. after drying your hair, you curled it, adding waves. you hadn’t really worn makeup the entire trip, but this was an occasion to do so.

you applied slightly brown eyeshadow, blending it out and adding some glitter, with faint liner and gluing on lashes for more effect. you applied mascara, a burgundy matte lipstick, and you went back into the room for your outfit. 

you pulled on a black dress that stopped mid-thigh, it clung to your frame, exposing some of your back, and cutting down just between your cleavage. it was racy, but you wanted to look good. 

slipping on some heels, you decided that you were ready to go. heading downstairs, you grabbed the address off of the counter. getting into your car, you used GPS the entire way there. it was a ten minute drive, nothing too drastic. 

when you arrived, you eagerly made your way inside. stepping over to the bar, you ordered a drink. something more on the fruity side. looking around, you finally spotted the boys. 

they were all seated, seemingly comfortable, in a booth. when you spotted tom, you felt your heart skip. he was wearing a long-sleeved, dark button-up. it hugged his muscular arms, and his chest. 

the cuffs were rolled up slightly, revealing his favorite watch, wrapped around his right wrist. the shirt was tucked into his dark dress pants. his hair slicked back, his sharp features on full display. 

finally pulling yourself out of your haze, aware you’d been ogling for too long, you made your way to their table. harrison was the first to spot you, a ridiculous grin forming on his lips.

“y/n, you’re gonna catch everyone’s attention wearing that,” he teased, “you look great.” 

this caught tom’s attention, his eyes finally finding you. you watched as his gaze traveled up and down your form, and you tried to remember to breathe.

the difference was, he didn’t speak. he looked away, taking a sip of his drink. you decided to ignore him, taking a seat next to harrison.

you clutched your drink in your hand tightly, nervous and anxious, simultaneously annoyed at his behavior. you tried to overlook it, knowing harrison wanted it to stop.

“it’s crowded in here tonight,” you spoke in attempts to make conversation, but it was quickly shut down.

“of course it is. it’s one of the nicest spots in town, nothing new,” tom dismisses, never once directly addressing you.

you felt your temper rising, tired of the back and forth. harrison glared at tom, and you didn’t bother wasting any more time.

“y’know what? just— whatever,” you scoffed, grabbing your drink and leaving the table. you went towards the dance floor, determined to have a good night one way or another. 

the music was loud, drowning out the people around you. it brought you some sort of comfort, not only drowning out everything else, but also your thoughts. 

you danced, carelessly. not concerned with who might be watching, not concerned with what anyone would have to say. 

taking another sip of your drink, you felt a figure behind you. when you turned around, it was a stranger — but an undeniably handsome one. 

he was your height, tanned with facial hair to accent his features. he smiled at you, and you smiled back. you took it as an invitation, and began to dance again. he followed along and you grinned, happy to be having a good time. 

when you turned around, the guy began to get handsy. his strong hands grabbed onto your hips, and you cringed slightly. when you tried to move away from him, he grabbed onto your hips yet again, pulling you back against him.

it was when he groped your backside, that you pushed him off of you. when you turned to walk away, he reached for your wrist but never made it quite that far.

you were able to hear the commotion, even over the music. you heard yelling, and you turned to see the guy on the floor. clutching his bleeding nose. standing over him, a fuming tom. 

all you could do was stare, gaping at him. what had gotten into him? 

the man had the audacity to stand and challenge tom, and tom had him on the ground in seconds. harrison appeared, yanking tom off of the guy. 

“get him out of here!” harrison barked at you, and you didn’t hesitate to do as he said. you grabbed tom’s arm, pulling him towards the back exit. 

tom shoved the door open, furiously. you jumped, as it caused it to slam against the brick wall before closing. you stood there watching him, unable to hide the fear from your eyes. 

“just calm down,” you urged, watching him stand there, livid.

tom’s head snapped up, eyes wild almost. unlike himself. “calm down? how can you tell me to calm down y/n! that asshole was in there, violating you!” he spits. 

you sighed, “it doesn’t matter. karma will get him. you didn’t have to intervene.” 

“like hell i didn’t! he wouldn’t have stopped. i refuse to standby and watch something bad happen to you,” tom shakes his head, running his fingers through his tousled strands.

“still. it’s not your place to protect me anymore, tom. it doesn’t matter!” you huffed, trying to get the point across.

“it does fucking matter, y/n!” tom argues.

“i’m not yours!” you spit angrily, tired of his possessiveness. tired of the lack of explanation. tired of his back and forth behavior.

this seemed to strike tom, hurt washing across his features, only for a moment. before the anger took over again.

“oh i know you’re not. trust me, i know. you’d be anyone else’s before you’d be mine, isn’t that right?” tom scowls.

you glare, tears pooling in your eyes. “you know damn well why i broke up with you in the first place! i wanted to move away and go to that school! i wanted you to move on. i didn’t think we could handle long distance!” 

tom chuckles humorlessly. “yeah. just like always, you’ve gotta make the decisions for both of us yeah? you didn’t give me a choice! you didn’t give me the fucking chance!”

“because i knew you’d never understand!” you huff.

“i never wanted easy, y/n! i wanted you. that’s what i wanted. and you just left, like it wasn’t shit.” tom scoffs, throwing his arms up.

“that’s not true and you know it,” you glare.

“you don’t care, y/n. it’s fine, just admit to it and be done with it!” tom insists, his anger still seeping off of him in waves.

“i can’t,” you shake your head.

“yeah?” tom stares at you for a few moments, silent. “why? because you want to keep me tied on your little string?” 

taken aback by his comment, you snap. “screw you, tom.” turning on your heel, you stormed across the parking lot. 

you didn’t make it far, before you felt a hand slap around your wrist, spinning you around. you collided with tom’s chest, and gasped. “let go—!” 

the air left your lungs, as his hands cupped your face and his lips crashed against your own. you wanted to resist, but you couldn’t. 

the taste of him was so familiar, something you’d missed. his scent surrounding you, his touch clouding your senses. 

“i can’t let you go,” tom spoke against your lips.


	8. Chapter 8

_“i can’t let you go,” tom spoke against your lips._

_you froze. eyes searching his, the familiarity of his lips against your skin made you shiver. it was something you hadn’t forgotten, something you’d missed._

_“then don’t,” you uttered finally. and it seemed to be all the permission tom needed, his hands were on your hips and your back was against the brick wall suddenly._

_you gasped at the suddenness of his actions, and your hands clutched at the front of his shirt as his lips pressed against yours—_

_“tom,” you moaned, and it didn’t seem to get his attention — “tommy, we can’t here—“_

_tom groaned, pulling away from you, “fine. give me your keys.”_

**———**

the two of you had just made it back to the beach house. you’d managed to escape without harrison and harry noticing, but you were sure they’d be calling eventually.

tom chased you up the staircase, and you squealed anxiously — determined to outrun him.

“you’re not gonna get very far,” you heard tom chuckle from close behind you, and you doubled your efforts in determination.

just as you stepped into your room, shutting the door — or trying, because the door wouldn’t shut. that’s when you realIzed that tom‘s shoe was stopping it from shutting.

he effortlessly pushed through the little crack in the door, stepping in and kicking it shut behind him.

“did you enjoy that little stunt?” tom questioned, a faint grin on his lips as he approaches you.

you shrugged, “maybe a little.”

tom closed what little space was left between the two of you, his lips falling hot on yours — and you moaned.

“i’ve missed you so much,” you confess against his lips, your fingers tangling in his hair as he squeezes your hips.

“missed you more,” tom replies, his hands shifting upwards, grabbing your breasts over the fabric of your dress. “this little dress drove me crazy tonight. y’know that? it leaves little to the imagination.”

you gasped, arching against his touch, “guess i succeeded in getting under your skin,” you grinned.

tom chuckled as he stripped himself of his shirt, his bare chest on display. a sight you’d missed, you could admit. “oh, you did. i could hardly stand the idea of another man looking at you.”

you smiled as his hands traveled behind your back, fingers toying with the zipper —

“—what about steph? what about us? _tommy_ —“

“shh. none of that, not right now. let’s just live in this moment, angel. yeah?” tom utters, his eyes searching yours, and you nod silently.

the dress pools at your feet, leaving you in your underwear. tom easily untangles the clasp of your bra, pulling it from your arms, pushing your underwear down.

“look at you. just as perfect as ever,” tom groans, eyeing you shamelessly. and you smile, tugging on his pants — successfully yanking them down his legs.

now you both were nude, nothing separating either of you. tom grabs your face, crashing his lips against yours — and you moan, feeling your breasts brush against his bare chest. his cock pressing against your thigh.

“are you wet for me, love?” tom hums, running his thumb across your bottom lip. you nod, desperate for his touch. “yeah? get on the bed.”

you’re quick to oblige, laying on your back just at the edge of the bed — your legs splayed open for him, shameless in your actions.

tom’s hovering atop of you in seconds, and you moan as he runs his fingers against your wetness, “always ready for me.” 

you nod, whimpering as he aligns his cock with your entrance — gradually sinking into your tight depths.

tom’s groans aloud, watching as he sinks into you. 

your hands on his face bring his attention back to you, and his gaze finds yours as his hips begin thrusting against you. 

gasping softly, your brows furrow at the immense amount of pleasure.

“angel,” tom groans softly, his forehead pressing against yours as he fucks into you, “so tight.”

“please, tommy—“ you whine, arching against him. your breasts brushing against his bare chest, the sensations adding to the pleasure. 

tom’s lips crash against yours, silencing you as he quickens his pace, “what is it? huh?” tom utters softly, his eyes watching your face intently.

you want to tell him that you love him. that you want more. but instead, you push him off of you. getting him to sit up against the bed frame, leaning against it.

straddling his lap, you sink onto his cock effortlessly. 

“shit, i—“ tom pauses as you begin bouncing on his cock, “i like this.” 

“yeah?” you hum, watching his gaze advert to your breasts — as they bounced just in front of his face, his hands on the round of your ass as it bounced with the rise and fall of your hips.

“so perfect. my girl is perfect,” tom utters, before his lips are wrapping around your nipple. you gasp, incapable of arguing with his, ‘my girl’ comment. technically you were never, not his. 

your heart belonged to him. even still. you loved him unlike any other.

“oh, god—“ you moan, arching against his mouth. his face buried against your chest. 

“gonna cum for me angel? c’mon,” tom encourages, his tongue flicking across the sensitive bud of your breast, and you feel yourself teetering on the edge.

“i’m gonna cum, tommy. i—“

“—give it to me, y/n. that’s it, angel—“

a loud cry erupts from you as you shake, your release washing over you in waves. tom groans aloud as you fall apart. 

“want you to cum too,” you breathe, doubling your efforts as you ride him.

tom’s brows furrow, and you watch as he studies how his cock disappears in and out of you — before his gaze shifts to your breasts — then to your face, and that seems to do it for him. 

“shit—,” he curses, groaning more expletives as he stills inside of you. 

the two of you sit like that for a few fleeting moments, until you move off of him. curling up next to him on the bed, you stare up at him.

things had certainly took a turn. 

something had finally shifted between tom and you. there were no more secrets, no more lies, no more obstacles.

the truth was out. and the truth didn’t change the fact that you both still loved one another, and wanted the same things.

but one question still remained.

“where do we go from here?” you question, wondering just what could happen from that point forth.

tom seems to consider this, shrugging his shoulders, “wherever we wanna go.”

**———**

_**one year later** _

_“can’t believe i’m actually here again. this year. with you,” you smile, climbing out of tom’s car. “never thought i’d be back here.”_

_tom smiles, walking with you towards the infamous beach house that held an incredible amount of memories, “and yet here we are, a year later. right back where it all started.”_

_you’d spent the entire year with tom, after that night you’d spent ‘making up for lost time.’ you’d managed to mend your relationship, to settle your differences._

_you both loved one another regardless of your mistakes._

_“there they are!” harrison’s voice chimes, and you laugh as he tackles tom._

_things finally felt right. as they always should’ve been._

_“seems like a good day to go to the beach, doesn’t it?” harry chimes in, and you nod eagerly._

_this year, you were ready for the trip. ready to spend time with the group, and with your boyfriend._

_“we’ll catch you out there, mate,” tom nods, glancing over at you as they disappear around the house without question. “what’s the matter, angel?”_

_you shake your head, “it’s nothing.”_

_tom clearly doesn’t believe you, setting your bags down as he pulls you against him, his strong arms wrapped around you — the place you felt safest._

_“liar.”_

_you roll your eyes at him, sighing. “just reminiscing. about the good and the bad times.”_

_tom’s nose brushes against yours. “i’m here, you’re here._  
_it’s you and me, love. for as long as you’ll have me. no need to worry.”_

_you feel your eyes water as your eyes meet his, “i love you, tommy.”_

_“i love you too, y/n.”_


End file.
